


The Final Impression

by YourDailyMemeDelivery



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Castiel, Angst, Dean-Centric, Destiel is canon, Emotionally Constipated Dean Winchester, Emotions, Episode: s15e18 Despair, Gen, Love Confessions, M/M, Sad, Season/Series 15
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2020-11-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:08:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27463945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YourDailyMemeDelivery/pseuds/YourDailyMemeDelivery
Summary: “Why does this sound like a goodbye?”“Because it is.”————After the Empty takes Castiel, Dean deals with the onslaught of emotions as he sits there alone.
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 2
Kudos: 50





	The Final Impression

**Author's Note:**

> Holy shit. I didn’t expect to come back to the Supernatural fandom, let alone write some fics, but after what happened in this episode. After losing interest around season 13/14, I’m back after what happened here and Castiel’s love confession. I found myself needing to write the aftermath with Dean as he sat alone in the bunker.

_“Why does this sound like a goodbye?”_

_“Because it is.”_

And then in a blink of an eye, it was gone. Cas, Billie, The Empty. Dean laid there sprawled against the wall, a mess of emotions stirring in his chest, Cas’ final goodbye echoing across the now empty room.

Confusion, Realization, Panic, Despair….

There was barely any time for him to act, to speak… To wrap his mind around everything. His arm burned with Cas’ final touch, and he sat there. His heart squeezed painfully and Dean couldn’t think.

**_“I love you.”_ **

Dean felt it coming. He wasn’t prepared and thus was thrown into an emotional storm as he tried to wrap his mind through everything. How it had all come to this… where he couldn’t even give a proper reply. 

Cas throws him aside, touching him for one last time, his blue eyes shining with tears, and a shaky smile. How Cas didn’t look bitter nor resigned, having long accepted his fate, he looked happy.

_“Happiness is not in the having, it’s in the being.”_

Castiel was imprinted in his mind, his heart and his whole being. He’d first left his Mark when he had pulled Dean from Hell and of course when he left, he left his final mark.

Dean laid his head in his hands. 

The despair set in and Dean ached.

Dean sat there alone drowning in his despair and inability to do anything. “I-... I-“ he choked on his words, his throat closing up.

_“Cas, I-“_

And it was all gone. 

Cas had experienced true happiness but what about him? 

In the whole decade that Dean had known Castiel, he never thought it would be like this. That this would be the end. The final impression, so to speak. 

Where Castiel has pulled him out of perdition leaving his first impression and then left with the biggest one of all.

Castiel’s handprint burned, burned in a reminder of his love and Dean didn’t have a clue on what to do. A new surge of emotions swept over Dean and he felt stuck. Pure under the riptide and unable to get out. Unable to sort through and fully figure out what he was feeling.

He tried to bury it again but the emotions cracked through the barriers and flooded through him again, leaving Dean helpless. 

He ached everywhere, the handprint burned and Castiel’s voice permanently etched into his thoughts. The image of Castiel’s watery eyes and his smile as a lone tear ran down his cheek. 

The look of pure love on his friend’s face.

How he looked free and happy as he looked into Dean’s eyes. 

The look of acceptance, adoration and joy. 

Dean felt his heart crack.

A new wave of emotional pain jolting through him as he sat there immobile and voiceless. What was there to say now? There was so much to say but he didn’t know how. 

Was this how Cas felt?

Was this longing ache in his heart, love? Did he love Castiel back? His sadness grew as slowly Dean came to realize the truth. 

He still was so very lost, so very confused, with no idea on where to start in this emotional storm. The feeling of the handprint steadied Dean just a little bit, giving him the certainty on what he was feeling.

And it caused a whole new load of emotions dumped over him like a cold bucket of water. Still leaving him speechless as he sat against the wall, unmoving.

Love.

The final impression was love.

And it had come too late.


End file.
